Exercise -they say, Feel better- they say


Exercise is something that I truly avoid, always have. I know there are two kinds of people in my life: Crazy people who exercise and those who like to eat and drink. I fall into the latter category and I am A-OK with that. My entire life, I have always hated to exercise. When I was little and we had the mile run day in elementary school-I would play sick and stay home. Then some asshole PE teacher made a new rule that you had to “make it up”. WHAT? I was sick, I earned a pass! As I got older again, exercise and sports were just not my thing. I didn’t want to exert myself, get all sweaty and then go back to class looking like shit. No thanks. I have no problem with my friends that love to exercise all the time. Whatever..good for you! There are three things/sports I enjoy: Swimming, walking and Yoga. Sadly, I guess these are all singular activities but they are dual purpose for me. Not only am I doing something good for my body but I tend to use this time to think, decide and file. Hmm…what? Right. So I am not just doing these activities but multi-tasking about all the things that I need to do, finish and sort before I say done and then file away. I get a lot of shit done during this time. Anyway, the weather is finally getting nice-global warming has Chicago at 66 degrees in mid-February. Fanfuckingtastic I say BRING IT ON! I decided to let my 120 lb dog Winston take me for a long walk. We hit the trails of the forest preserve and walked over 2 miles and it was wonderful. We discussed so much during our walk and I got to think and file too! So, super! Walked, got some exercise in, went home, drank a beer and by evening I could not walk. I literally crawled to the bathroom and iced my feet the rest of the night. Planters Fasciitis and heel spurs… THAT is what exercise does to me. Not only do I now have the expense of hundred dollar orthopedic sneakers but I have horrible pain in both feet. So, F U exercise. I tried it and now I suffer. Lesson: Have necessary tools and equipment to avoid injury during exercise.


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